I can not lose you
by Queen Stowe
Summary: One shot, situated on the first episode of the third season. Victoria and Conrad never had an easy relationship but how it feels to believe he will die.


**One shot, situated on the first episode of the third season. Victoria and Conrad never had an easy relationship but how it feels to believe he will die.**

**I can not lose you**

On the balcony sipping a glass of liquor Victoria was stunned, she could not forget the doctor's words, "it is with Huntington's syndrome," much less the complementation of Conrad "is fatal." Her in the least understood what she was feeling, she hated that man, had every reason to do so, she should be happy, but I just could not bear to live without him, with a quick thought she returned to the room, dropped the glass on top of the nightstand and headed to the Conrad room.

When he reached the front door of Victoria almost gave up, but felt much need to see it and opened it slowly, did not intend to wake him, it was dark but she stood watching him, just getting to see his chest rise with each breath. Logo horrifying thoughts came into her mind, she remembered the things he told her about the disease and as the grandfather himself had suffered, began to feel tears flooding his eyes, the scene of his faintness came clear in her mind and she did not can prevent tears and a sob that came along with them, which covered her mouth but it was too late Conrad sat up and lit the lamp asking visibly surprised:

-Victoria What happened?

-I'm sorry did not want to wake him!

-You're crying?

-No !

He raised his eyebrows and smiled with some irritation, had heard her sob and his face was wet, he pulled the covers up and approached her watching her carefully, she lowered her eyes to avoid eye contact with him who raised her chin and asked:

-Why are you so Victoria?

-Why ... nothing!

-No one cries for nothing!

-Well I cry!

She turned to leave the room but he grabbed her arm and made her face him again as required:

-Please Be honest with me at least once in life, it's two o'clock in the morning, you were crying in the doorway of my room is clear that something happened!

-Everything happened Conrad ... everything was fine, I was happy here ... you was happy to Albany ... and suddenly everything collapsed!

She hated how her voice broke every word spoken but needed to vent, eventually suffocated if I did not, he stepped back pulling the arm causing him to sit beside her on the bed and said:

-I do not understand Victoria ...

-Neither do I. Conrad, I'm not understanding our bankruptcy, his illness ... nothing!

-From All I thought you'd be happy!

-How can you say that? I never wanted that ...

-Sorry ... I just forget that Victoria there is nothing you can do!

-I do not want to lose you!

The words came out in a stream of air, without control, without thought, came from his heart, he looked totally amazed as she looked terrified, soon the tears began to form in his eyes again, he felt anger, see her crying was unbearable, then quietly pulled her into his arms, she could not resist the contrary, buried her face in the crook of his neck and let himself be carried away by tears. Silence fell for minutes as he held her tightly, she was gradually ceasing to cry, but went with him, smelling her perfume, her mind raced questioning his feelings, after all what she really felt for this man, as well was no time to think, Victoria was really tired of thinking, then pulled away from him, looked steadily into her beautiful blue eyes and kissed him.

When their tongues met Conrad pulled her closer intertwining arms around her waist, the kiss was long, forlorn, full of longing and desires, but when he left Victoria rose and stepped back frightened, he also rose and approached again, both were stunned but he was unwilling to let her go, not after that kiss, feeling his closeness she said:

-Conrad I better get back to my room!

-No way!

He moved closer, she fell and hit the back wall, he held her wrists above her head and looked deep into his brown eyes asking:

-Victoria At least today let their barriers aside!

- Conrad ...

-Only Today!

She just nodded her head totally confused, he pressed his body against hers she can feel it already erect and his eyes filled with pleasure he smiled and kissed her first gently letting his tongue percorresse his mouth, then deepened the kiss she surrendered to him wrapping my arms around his neck and holding her gray hair, when they had no breath he broke the kiss fingering on her neck and chest, she rubbed her hair, he then started kissing and take small bites on her neck and in her earlobe, she closed her eyes and whole body shivered every losing his touch. Suddenly he stopped, she opened her eyes and their eyes met both had desire, longing and passion, none could deny that. He returned to caress her breast and then slid her nightgown that fell at his feet, leaving only the lingerie, he felt her breath catch in her throat, she was amazing, her perfect body, her porcelain skin, her black messy hair on shoulders, her full red lips, her eyes bright with pupils starting to dilate with desire, he wanted to possess her, he wanted her forever.

Conrad knelt contemplating its beauty and started kissing her belly, rising kisses, delighting in the shivers that still caused her, arrived in the breasts and started circling them with his fingers, then licked one of them, she does not can take it anymore and pulled him into her mouth again, she needed to have it at that moment, he took the hint and lifted her up, she wrapped her legs around his waist that turned and put her in bed with strength and warmth at the same time. Conrad took his own shirt before climbing pressing his body against her and caressing her curves, he wanted to enjoy the moment but she wanted it inside him urgently and began to slide his underwear, he helped her and then pulled her lingerie with teeth, the touch of his mouth on her thigh excited her even more and she pulled her lips with an intense kiss, then whispered in his ear "I want you now Conrad". She did not need to say anything more and he put his hand on his private parts feeling the pool that had formed, stroked slowly making her moan and introduced her with all the softness you desire allowed him, the feeling of having him inside itself again was intoxicating and she moaned his name several times before reaching the apex and when they arrived she learned that her feeling was more than desire, passion was, she scratched his back but he felt no pain, felt the joy of having it again.

After the pleasure sated both fell exhausted and the totally erratic breaths, but on opposite sides of the bed, she stared at the ceiling lost in torturous thoughts, he was on hand to watch her willing to memorize every detail of that night, even unintentionally presses her he pulled her onto his chest, as if prepared for a rejection that did not come, instead she smiled and snuggled into his arms that held even stronger.

Several minutes had passed and they were still there embraced Conrad had a smile that day he had been diagnosed with a terrible illness, lost his job as governor and had no idea how Grayson would remain financially but was happy anyway did he and Victoria had not had that kind of contact three years, he could not stop thinking of her phrase "I do not want to lose you." Distracted in his thoughts Conrad just realized that she watched as she rubbed her face against his chin, he looked up and could see the tears welling in his eyes, he then moved a little and asked:

-is Sorry?

-No.

-Then why the tears?

-Conrad ... What happened today ...

-Why please do not ask me to forget!

-I do not want to forget, actually a long time since I did not feel well.

-And how does it feel?

-Almost happy!

She said this with a whisper but he can see sincerity in his eyes, smiling again he stroked his face and asked:

- Why the tears, dear?

-'You know ...

-Victoria ...

-I'm so confused, I spent the last years hating you, but know you'll die was as if something had broken inside!

Her voice broke into excitement and he embraced the most comforting way he could, wanting to take the pain that went with it totally choked voice:

-I know we had many problems Conrad, I know I said horrible things to each other, but ... I'm not prepared to live without you!

After hearing that he actually choked He did not expect to see her so delivered and weakened, he sat on the bed and eyes tightly in her eyes searching for words mean, it did not come but she anticipated his intentions and asked:

-Only Tell me you will not forsake me!

His heart sank with the way she asked, he stroked her face again and said with more sorrow for her than for yourself:

-I can not say that Vic, but while I'm here I'll be by your side!

She kissed him again, a long, tender kiss, when he left struggling to hold more tears and said:

-Let's sleep, you must be tired!

-Myself promise you will not suffer for it Vic!

-Conrad ...

-Promise!

-Okay ... I promise!

She turned off the light and snuggled into his chest again, he laced his arms around her slender body, kissing the top of her head as she smiled, she closed her eyes and bad thoughts returned to haunt her, but treated departs and let them sleep to find her anyway despite all felt safe in the arms of Conrad. When he felt her breathing change he smiled even more embracing stronger, feeling the satisfaction of having his body over him, he loved her so much already thought that this disease would be worthwhile after all was a way to bring it to near he did not know how things would be the next day but maybe could live as one happy in his last months of life couple.

**Well I really wanted this to happen and to watch that episode again the idea formed in my head. **

**I hope you enjoyed forgive for being so long, thanks for reading and comments are always welcome!**


End file.
